Parshas Tetzaveh

The Key to Success Is…..

And you shall speak to all that are wise-hearted, whom I have filled with a spirit of wisdom, to make Aaron’s garments… .” (28:3)

HaRav Yehoshua Isaac Shapira zt”l was known as Harav Aizel Charif because of his exceedingly sharp intellect. He was one of the greatest Torah leaders of his generation (in the 1800’s). He once travelled to the yeshiva of Volozhin, the premier yeshiva of his time, to look for a prospective husband for his daughter. He gathered all the students together and asked a very difficult and complicated question. He said that whoever could answer the question would become his son-in-law [the dating and marriage process was very different in those days than in our days]. The students worked for days and nights, thinking how to answer the question. After a few days, they lined up to give their answers. None was able to answer the question. Rav Aizel Charif went into his carriage to return home, without a son-in-law. After his carriage had gone some distance, he heard a voice calling out to stop. One of the boys from the yeshiva was running after the carriage. Rav Aizel thought that the boy had just figured out the answer to the question. The boy said that he didn’t know the answer, but he truly wanted to know what it was. Rav Aizel smiled. This is the boy that he wanted as a son-in-law. One who was a “mevakesh”, one who loved Torah so much that he had an unquenchable thirst to know it. (from sefer Yalkut Lekach Tov by Rabbi Yaakov Yisroel Beyfuss)

Hashem put extra wisdom into the Jews who were “wise-hearted”, enabling them to have the skills to help build the Mishkan, its vessels, and the garments for the kohanim. Rabbi Chaim Shmuelevitz zt”l, the late Rosh HaYeshiva of Yeshivas Mir, questions what qualification was needed to be considered a “wise-hearted” person who had merited to acquire extra wisdom from Hashem? Rabbi Chaim Shmuelevitz zt”l in his sefer, Sichas Mussar, proves from the story of King Solomon that a “wise-hearted” person is one who has a strong desire to acquire wisdom. He is a “mevakesh”. That person will merit the gift of wisdom from Hashem. King Solomon ascended to the throne, becoming the king of the Jewish People, at the age of 12. Hashem appeared to him in a dream, asking what he wanted. Solomon answered that he desired an ”understanding heart”, to be able to judge the people properly. Hashem was very pleased at Solomon’s request. He could have asked for riches or a long life, yet he didn’t. As a reward, Hashem granted Solomon riches and honor and the potential for long life, in addition to unmatched wisdom. Rabbi Chaim Shmuelevitz zt”l explains that King Solomon only merited the gift of profound wisdom because of his great yearning for wisdom. His yearning for wisdom was greater than his desire for wealth, honor, or a long life. A person who has a true and strong yearning for wisdom can merit receiving wisdom from Hashem. It was those Jews who thirsted for wisdom, that Hashem infused with greater wisdom, giving them the knowledge and skills to help build the Mishkan.

To what extent must a person yearn for wisdom to be considered “wise-hearted”? Rabbi Chaim Shmuelevitz zt”l says that we can get a glimpse of the extent, from one who had a strong yearning for honor. Haman had an intense desire for honor. All the people from 127 countries bowed down to him. Only one person, Mordechai did not bow. Since one person did not bow, Haman felt that all the honor of so many people bowing down to him, was worthless.

We can learn from Yehoshua how far a person must go in order to acquire wisdom. When Moshe ascended Har Sinai to receive the 10 Commandments, Yehoshua pitched a tent at the foot of the mountain. He remained alone from his family and friends for 40 days because he wanted to assist Moshe the very second that Moshe descended. Yehoshua was a “mevakesh”. This strong desire to assist Moshe earned Yehoshua the privilege of taking the reins of leadership from Moshe even though there were many thousands of candidates who were greater than he (see Ramban and Bal Haturim in Parshas Shelach). The Sforno (Parshas Pinchas 27:18) compared Yehoshua’s yearning desire, to that of the “wise hearted”. The “wise-hearted” acquired extra wisdom from Hashem because of their burning desire for wisdom. Similarly, Yehoshua achieved a position of leadership because of his burning desire to serve Moshe.

A key to success is to be a true “mevakesh”. If you truly have a burning and yearning desire to do good, you will be rewarded with extra Divine assistance to help you succeed.

Parshas Mishpatim

The Key to a Happy Marriage & Other Personal Relationships, Part 2

“Do not afflict any widow or orphan”. (22:21)

The Torah says not to cause pain or harm to a widow or an orphan. Rashi says that the same prohibition applies to harming any person. The Torah specifically mentions these because they are more sensitive and defenseless, thus they are more susceptible to be harmed. The Rambam (Hilchos Dayos 7:8) says that this even applies to a rich widow or even a powerful widow such as a queen. The reason is that they feel more dispirited than other women. The Rambam continues that we must be especially careful to speak softly and respectfully to them.

The Sefer Lekech Tov brings two instances illustrating the greatness of our Torah leaders in how they acted towards widows. Rav Yosef Chaim Sonnenfeld zt”l was the Chief Rabbi of Yerushalayim during the time of the British Mandate. When he was younger, he was a student in the yeshiva in Pressburg. Every Shabbos the students would leave the yeshiva to eat at the homes of various families. Every week, the young Rav Sonnenfeld would disappear enroute. Some of his fellow students became curious and decided to follow him. They followed him to one of the poorer sections of the city, down many steps to an apartment in the cellar. Rav Sonnenfeld knocked on the door of a widow and in a loud and cheerful voice called out his Shabbos greetings. Then he returned to his Shabbos meal. His friends couldn’t contain their curiosity and asked if the widow was his relative. He replied that she wasn’t.  He just wanted to bring joy to a widow. It was just a few words on his part, yet that was enough to bring a smile to the widow’s face.

Rav Yosef Zev Soloveitchik zt”l  was the Chief Rabbi of the town of Brisk. Since he was exceedingly humble, he never signed his name followed by his title as the Head of the Rabbinical court of the town of Brisk. He once heard that a widow living in the outskirts of the city needed encouragement and support. He quickly went to visit her. A younger person accompanied Rav Yosef Zev. He asked the fellow to quickly go ahead of him and announce to the widow that the Rabbi of Brisk was coming to visit her. He had the fellow use his title that he normally didn’t use in order to make the widow feel special and important.

These are the actions of one who has truly imbibed his Torah learning and acts accordingly. This is the sensitivity we must show to everyone in need.

Is there something else to do to make others feel good and to foster loving relationships?

Avraham’s servant, Eliezer, was sent to look for a wife for Yitzchak. He met Rivka at the well and asked for a drink. With haste, she gave him a drink.  On her own, she offered to provide water for Eliezer’s camels. After being asked for lodging, she added on her own that her family had ample food for Eliezer and his animals. Levi ben Gershon zt”l, known as the Ralbag, (Braishis 24:19) learns from this episode that an ideal servant and a true ba’al chessed, a truly kind person, is one who can anticipate the needs of another. He must be keenly observant to notice a need without being asked. Then he must be conscientious is fulfilling that need. Eliezer saw this trait in Rivkah and knew that she would be the perfect wife for Yitzchak. The Ralbag says that it does not suffice for a servant to follow orders and do all that he is asked. His master will still be lacking because he won’t realize to verbalize all his needs. In order be considered the quintessential servant, he must be observant to notice ways to help his master and act on those needs. Rav Henach Leibowitz zt”l, Rosh Hayeshiva of Chofetz Chaim, pointed out that being alert to the needs of others is a middah of its own, that must be worked on to perfect. One can’t be a complete servant or baal chessed without this trait. King Shaul’s son, Yehonasan lacked this trait. He had such love and devotion to Dovid and would have done anything for him. Yet, Yehonasan overlooked Dovid’s need for food. He didn’t even provide him with two loaves of bread. As a result, Dovid had to get food from the city of Nov, the city of Kohanim. Since that city provided food for Dovid, King Shaul killed the entire city of Nov (Gemorah Sanhedrin 103B).

We see from the Ralbag that it is an important middah to be a complete ba’al chessed and anticipate the needs of others. This same trait is important for a happy marriage. Noticing a spouse’s needs before it is verbalized will foster a loving and lasting relationship.

Parshas Yisro

Special Thanks for???

“And Yisro rejoiced over all the good that Hashem had done for the Jews, that he saved them from Egypt. Now I know that Hashem is greater than all idols, for the very thing that they had planned came upon them”. (18;9,11)

There was a very wealthy man living in Pressburg, Slovakia. Although he was blind, he lived alone and took care of himself. A group of robbers wanted to rob him of his wealth. They noticed that he left his home every day at the same time and walked the same route, through a public park. They dug a hole in the middle of the route and covered it with twigs. They figured that the blind man would fall into the hole and hurt his ankle. The robbers would then appear and “kindly” offer to carry the man into his home.  Once inside, they would rob him. The blind man exited his home and began his daily stroll. He took the exact route that he always did. He walked to within ten feet of the hole and inexplicably turned around and returned home. That was something that he had never done before and it saved him from being robbed. He never knew that Hashem had saved him from harm. Rabbi Moshe Sofer zt”l, known as the Chasam Sofer, somehow heard about this story that had occurred in his town. He said that this story illustrates what King David meant in Tehillim (117). King David says that all the nations should praise Hashem’s kindness to the Jewish People. Why should the nations praise Hashem for that which would most likely cause them unhappiness? The Chasam Sofer explains that the nations know that their evil plots against the Jews that didn’t come to fruition because of Hashem’s kindness to the Jews. The nations should praise Hashem because they alone clearly see the hand of Hashem protecting the Jews from harm. (based on a story in the book, Around the Maggid’s Table by Rabbi Paysach Krohn)

How many times does Hashem save us from pain and sorrow that we are not even aware of?

Rashi says that Yisro rejoiced after hearing all that Hashem did to punish Pharaoh and the Egyptians for treating the Jewish People harshly. Furthermore, Yisro said, “Now I know that Hashem is greater than all idols”. What brought Yisro to come to this conclusion? Rashi, explains that it was the way that Hashem punished the Egyptians.  Their punishment wasn’t arbitrary. Rather, it mirrored the evil that they did to the Jews. They were punished by the same means that they used against the Jews. Rav Henach Leibowitz zt”l explains, when one sees the truth in Hashem’s justice it leads one to repentance. In Yisro’s case, it led him to recognize Hashem as the only true Supreme Being. One sees the beauty and righteousness of Hashem’s judgement when the punishment exactly matches the crime. It shows, with clarity, that there is a “master plan” by a true King.

Yisro was privy to information that the Jewish People did not even know. That further impressed him with the greatness of Hashem. The Targum Onkelos explains the pasuk, “Now I know that Hashem is greater than all idols, for the very thing that they had planned came upon them”. Rav Yitzchok Zev Halevi Soloveitchik zt”l  explains the word “planned”. He says that the Egyptians had planned to do many more terrible things to the Jewish People but not all their plans came to fruition. Yet, Hashem still punished the Egyptians for those thoughts! The Talmud, Kiddushin 39, says that Hashem punishes the other nations for their thoughts of harming the Jews, even if their plans don’t get carried out. The Jewish People were not aware of those evil thoughts. However, the Talmud (Sanhedrin 106A) says that Yisro was aware! Yisro was one of Pharaoh’s three advisors and had the inside knowledge of all the Egyptian’s evil plans against the Jewish People. Yisro, alone, was able to appreciate “all” the good that Hashem did for the Jews. Only he could properly praise Hashem for saving the Jews for all the evil that the Egyptians had planned.

Even though we have many challenge’s in life, we have so much to be thankful for.  Hashem does so much good for us. We must be appreciative of all the good that we see and for all the good that we are not even aware of.

Parshas Beshalach

Help is Just Around the Corner!

“They came to Marah, but they could not drink the water of Marah because it was bitter…. And they came to Elim, where there were twelve springs of water and seventy palm trees…” (15:23,27)

The Talmud (Ta’anis 19B) brings a fascinating story. In the time of the Beis HaMikdash, the Jews would pilgrimage to Jerusalem three times a year. One year, during the Succos holiday, there wasn’t enough water for all the people. Nakdimon ben Gurion was a wealthy man who loved the Jewish People. He asked a Roman prince to borrow water from his twelve large wells. He told the prince that the water would be returned by the rains that would surely come after the Jews would pray for rain. The prince refused. The prince finally agreed when Nakdimon told him that he would pay him a large amount of money if his wells would not be refilled by a certain date. Thanks to Nakdimon, the Jews had plenty of water. Time passed. It did not rain and the Roman prince’s wells were not filled.  When the last day came and there was still no rain, the Roman sent a messenger to Nakdimon to pay. Nakdimon was not impatient. He was confident that Hashem would help. That afternoon the messenger returned but Nakdimon said that the time was not up yet. Towards evening the messenger returned but Nakdimon pushed him off again. At that point Nakdimon went to the Beis HaMikdash and davened to Hashem. Hashem answered his prayers and the rain suddenly started pouring, filling the Roman’s wells.

Hashem took the Jewish People out of Egypt. They were on their journey, traveling through the desert on their way to Eretz Yisroel. They were thirsty. They came to a place that had water, but they could not drink it because the water was bitter. They named that place Marah, which means bitterness. Hashem was testing them to see how they would react to their lack of water. They should have approached Moshe to pray to Hashem for water.  Instead, what did they do? They complained, thus failing this test.  Moshe did cry out to Hashem. Hashem told Moshe to throw a specific tree into the water and miraculously the water became drinkable. The Ibn Ezra says that the Jews remained there for just one day. The very next day the Jews travelled to a place called Elim.  At Elim there were twelve springs of water, a separate one in honor of each tribe. There were also seventy date palm trees, one for each of the elders. The Ibn Ezra says that the Jews found Elim to be so pleasant that they remained there for twenty days. The Chofetz Chaim says, had the Jews known that they would find plentiful, drinkable water the very next day, they would not have complained. The Chofetz Chaim points out that by nature people are shortsighted, therefore they complain. If they lack something or things aren’t going the way they want, people may complain.  If people would be a little more patient, they would often find that things turn out better than they had first thought. If one is not patient, he may cause himself unnecessary aggravation or unhappiness that may soon prove to be irrelevant. Why should he suffer for no reason?

What is the solution to help protect us against needless aggravation and unhappiness? Obviously, the first solution is patience. As illustrated by the Jewish People and the water, often good tidings and improvement are “right around the corner”. Furthermore, we can follow Rashi’s suggestion (Devorim 32:7). Rashi says we should think about our past, how Hashem helped us and saved us from certain difficulties. Hashem has a “good track record”.  We should have confidence that Hashem will help us now, as well.  

A person can save himself from needless aggravation and pain with the realization that “help is right around the corner”. After all, Hashem has a good “track record” of helping.

Parshas Bo

Truth or Consequences!

“…There was a thick darkness throughout the land of Egypt…. No man could rise from his place for three days, but for the Jewish People there was light….” (10:22-23)

During the last three days of the plague of Darkness, the Egytptians could not move.  They were literally frozen in place from the tangible darkness. The Midrash says that during these three days, Hashem had the Jews enter the homes of the Egyptians. The Jews saw where the Egyptians hid their wealth. Before the Jews left Egypt, they asked the Egyptians for this wealth that they had seen. When the Egyptians pretended they didn’t have anything, the Jews were able to tell them exactly where the items were hidden. However, during these three days of Darkness, while the Egyptians were immobile, not one Jew took advantage to take any item belonging to the Egyptians! When the Egyptians realized that the Jews could have taken anything they wanted without asking they were so impressed at their honesty.

The Orchos Tzaddikim discusses the importance of emulating Hashem and exhibiting honesty to all people. He quotes a Midrash (Devorim 3:3) which relates a story about Rabbi Shimon ben Shetach who purchased a donkey from an Arab. A precious stone was later found hanging on the donkey’s neck. Rabbi Shimon told his students, “I purchased a donkey, not a precious stone!” He went and returned the gem to the Arab. The Arab was very impressed by Rabbi Shimon’s honesty and exclaimed, “Blessed is the G-d of Shimon ben Shetach!”  The Orchos Tzaddikim also quotes a story from the Talmud (Yevamos 63A). Rav’s wife would constantly act contrary to his wishes. When he would ask her to serve him lentils, she would serve him peas; if he asked her for peas, she would serve him lentils. When Rav’s son, Chiya, grew up, he would reverse the requests that Rav had asked him to convey to his wife. Chiya did it out of respect for his father. That way Rav would get what he had wanted. When Rav found out what his son was doing he told him not to do it anymore.  Rav quoted a pasuk to his son, “They have taught their tongue to speak lies….” (Jeremiah 9:4).  Chiya’s intentions were noble. He wanted his father to get what he had asked for. Chiya also wanted to foster peace between his parents. Yet, Rav was concerned that this type of behavior may lead his son to becoming a liar. He was concerned that a breach in honesty would eventually lead to dishonesty.

Rav Henach Leibowitz zt”l points out, we know that there are times that one is permitted to “lie” for the sake of promoting peace. In those instances, it is a mitzvah to do so. However, there is a very fine line distinguishing when one may “lie” and when one may not. Rav Leibowitz zt”l says that is only through the teachings of the Torah that we can find the proper balance of when we are permitted to “lie”. Even more so, if the lines between honesty and falsehood are blurred, one’s actions will suffer.  One can think he is doing the right thing when in reality it is wrong. Rav Leibowitz zt”l quoted two sources to prove his point. Avrohom’s servant, Eliezer, went to the house of Besuel, to find a wife for Yitzchak. Eliezer asked them, “If you intend to do kindness and truth with my master, tell me…”. The Sforno explains what Eliezer was saying. Let me know if you intend to do kindness to Avraham by sending your daughter far away. Let me know if you intend to act with truth by doing what is in the best interests of your daughter, Rivkah. It would be a big honor for her to become part of the illustrious family of Avraham. Rav Leibowitz zt”l asks, what does this have to do with truth? Wouldn’t it be a lack of kindness not to do what was best for Rivkah? Rav Leibowitz zt”l answers, that Rivkah’s family was entrusted to take care of her. If they would not do what is best for her, that would be violating their trust. That would be a violation of truth. Similarly, if we are entrusted with something to do, it would be a violation of truth if we would not do the assignment the best way that we can.  The Ibn Ezra explains “truth” as ensuring that the act of kindness is done. Rav Leibowitz zt”l learns an important concept from this. One may be very kind, always looking to help others. However, his kindness may not last. Once the initial excitement dies down or once things become a little difficult, he may stop doing the act of kindness. However, if he is a person of truth, he will abide by his word and make sure that he completes his act of kindness.

A truthful person will try to do that which is right. He will work hard, attempting to complete the acts of kindness that he started.

Parshas Shmos

What Goes Around Comes Around!

“And the shepherds came and drove them away, but Moshe stood up and helped them”. (2:17)

Early one morning, Yoni, an Israeli Defense Force soldier, was shot by an Arab terrorist. Yoni passed out and was bleeding profusely. Another soldier stationed nearby rushed over and called for help. Meanwhile he kept applying pressure to the wound. His actions saved Yoni from bleeding to death. Yoni’s parents wanted to thank the soldier that saved their son’s life, but he couldn’t be located. They hung up a sign in the grocery store that they owned, describing what had happened. They hoped that eventually they might find out who the mystery soldier was. About a year later, a woman customer noticed the sign and said that it was her son, Yair, who had saved Yoni’s life. Yoni’s mother couldn’t thank her enough. After a moment, Yair’s mother asked Yoni’s mother, “Don’t you remember me?” She didn’t remember her. Yair’s mother said that twenty years earlier she used to live nearby. Once she had entered this same grocery looking very sad and depressed. Yoni’s mother had asked her what was bothering her. She had said that she was going through a very difficult time and was also pregnant. She had decided to have an abortion. As soon as she had said the word “abortion”, Yoni’s parents spoke to her at length.  They calmed her down and she decided not to have the abortion. She gave birth to a son whom she named Yair. Yair was only alive because of the caring and sincere concern of Yoni’s parents. Twenty years later, Yair, whose life they helped save, saved their son Yoni’s life.   (Adapted from friendsofefrat.org)

The Egyptians were killing all the Jewish baby boys. Baby Moshe was put in the river in a basket (Shmos 2:4).  His sister Miriam stood nearby to see what would happen to him (the Yalkut Shimoni says, Miriam had prophesized that Moshe would redeem the Jews from Egyptian bondage.  She wanted to see how the prophecy would be fulfilled if Moshe was now in a very dangerous situation).  Miriam’s actions were rewarded years later.  Since she waited to see what would happen to Moshe, when she got tzoraas (a special skin disease for saying slander) all the Jews waited for her. Hashem’s Holy presence, the Aron (holy ark) and thereby all the people waited for seven days until she was healed. Rav Dovid Leibowitz zt”l points out that the Jews understood the infinite holiness of Eretz Yisroel and what it meant to enter it. They wanted to enter it as soon as possible. Yet, they were kept waiting in order to repay Miriam for the few moments that she had waited previously, to see what would happen to Moshe. It wasn’t an extraordinary act of kindness to see what would happen to one’s baby brother, Yet Miriam was rewarded for it. Even for doing a small act of kindness one receives a great reward!

Yisro’s seven daughters were shepherds. When they came to the well to get water for their animals, the other shepherds routinely drove them away.  One time, Moshe, after escaping near death in Egypt, came to Midyan and witnessed this scene at the well. Although these girls were strangers, Moshe saved them from the other shepherds. Moshe eventually married Tziporah, one of Yisro’s daughters. Years later when Moshe was returning to Egypt to redeem the Jewish People, Tziporah saved his life. An angel appearing like a snake sought to kill Moshe for not circumcising his son right away. Moshe had postponed it to do Hashem’s bidding to save the Jews. Moshe should have performed the bris before he set-up his tent for lodging.  Tziporah understood what was happening and quickly performed the bris, herself. In so doing, she saved Moshe’s life.

The Chofetz Chaim zt”l says, we see from this that the kindness you do for others is eventually repaid to you!
You benefit yourself, by doing an act of kindness to others!