Parshas Beshalach

Nearer Can Be Further!

“…Hashem did not lead them by way of the land of the Plisthim, although it was nearer.…” (Shmos 13:17)

In pre-war Europe, many traveling salesmen would go from city to city. They would spread their wares on a table, in the corner of the local shul, to sell them. One such salesman entered the Polish city of Stavisk and entered the beis medrash of Rabbi Chaim Leb Mishkovsky, who was the head of the beis din (Jewish court) in the city. The salesman spread out his wares. He had siddurim, tzitzis, tefillin and mezuzos, among other things. Rabbi Chaim Leb noticed that the salesman also put out books that were well known to be heretical. Rav Chaim Leb quickly grabbed the pile of books and threw them into the nearby furnace. The salesman complained that the rav caused him a monetary loss. Furthermore, he explained to the rav that he needed to sell those types of books to make a living. He couldn’t make enough money just selling religious items. Rabbi Mishkovsky responded that, of course, he would pay for the loss of money that he caused. He also told the salesman that it was forbidden to make a living by selling heretical books to Jews. Rabbi Mishkovsky told him that he would find him another job by the next morning. The next morning Rabbi Mishkovsky told him about the job that was available. The local priest needed someone to ring the church bells every day. The salesman was shocked. He told the rav that he would never work for a priest who espoused idolatry! The rav responded. You are too uncomfortable to ring the church bells to awaken the gentiles to go to church to their avodas zara. Yet, you have no compunction selling heretical books to Jewish youth to try to entice them to serve idols! It is forbidden for a Jew to sell these items!     

(Yalkut Lekach Tov by Yaakov Yisroel Beifus)

The Chofetz Chaim zt”l explains that when the Jews left Egypt Hashem had two options. Hashem could have led them through the desert or through the land of the Plishtim. Each choice had an advantage and disadvantage.  If the Jews would go to Eretz Yisroel via the land of the Plishtim, they would be able to buy food. On the negative side, that route posed a great danger. The Jews who left Egypt had sunk to the 49^th level of impurity. If they would pass through the land of the Plishtim, they might be further affected by the impurities of the Plishtim and might not want to go to Har Sinai to receive the Torah. If the Jews would travel through the barren desert, they would not be affected by the impurities of an idol worshipping people. However, they would not have food available.

Hashem determined that it would be better to lead the Jews through the barren desert rather than chance them sinking to the 50^th level of impurity by having some association with the Plishtim. Hashem decided that it would be more important to avoid having the Jews sink spiritually even though that would necessitate Hashem performing open miracles to provide food for them.

The Chofetz Chaim zt”l learns from this that a person should not be involved in a livelihood that is contrary to Torah values. He should not be concerned how he will manage financially if he avoids an improper job. (Chofetz Chaim Al HaTorah) I know of someone who quit his job, before even having a replacement job, to avoid being a part of dishonest business practices. Eventually, he was offered a better job at a reputable company.

The Chofetz Chaim zt”l continues, If Hashem could provide sustenance for 600,000 men in the desert, then certainly Hashem could provide sustenance for the person who is following the dictates of the Torah.

Parshas Vaera

Don’t Take the Fresh Bread Away from Me!

“I appeared to Avraham, Yitzchak, and Yaakov as Kell Shakkai, but I did not make Myself known to them by My name, Hashem.” (Shmos 6:3)

As WWII was ending, the Nazis attempted to promote a positive image of themselves to the outside world. They sent a truck carrying fresh loaves of bread to one of the concentration camps. They also sent a camera crew to video the prisoners receiving the bread. They wanted to show how well they treated their prisoners, that they gave them fresh bread daily. When the Nazis announced to the prisoners that they were giving fresh bread, huge lines immediately formed. The smell of the fresh bread was so tantalizing. Reuven joined a huge line in eager excitement. He hadn’t eaten a piece of fresh bread in years, let alone a warm piece. He couldn’t stand still as he imagined himself eating a piece of warm, fresh bread. As the line moved closer, Reuven saw that the supply of fresh bread was dwindling. He kept davening to Hashem, “Please let there be a loaf left for me”. When he reached the head of the line, there were two loaves of bread left. He did get a loaf. Thank you, Hashem! He took the loaf and ran into the privacy of his bunkhouse to eat his new treasure. As he was about to take a bite out of the bread, a non-Jewish prisoner came into the bunkhouse and demanded the bread. Reuven refused. Reuven thought, “Hashem I have been strong in my belief up until this point. If I lose this bread, I am finished believing in you!” The non-Jewish prisoner started beating him. “Hashem, Why are You doing this evil to me?!” Reuven would not let go of the bread. Even as he was being beaten and bloodied, he still did not let go of his bread. Only after was he was beaten into unconsciousness, did the bread slip out of his hands. Reuven awoke hours later. He left his bunkhouse to go outside. It was eerily silent. Reuven went a little further and saw why it was so quiet. He saw dead bodies strewn all over. The cruel Nazis had poisoned the bread. They had gotten the video footage that they had desired. They had never intended to be kind to the prisoners. Thank you, Hashem, for taking away my bread and saving my life!

Before Moshe even went to Egypt to free the Jewish People, Hashem had already told him that Pharoah would initially refuse to do so. Hashem had said that Pharaoh would not send the Jews free until Egypt was totally punished (Shmos 3:19-20). However, Moshe did not expect the strait of the Jews to become more dire due to his coming. Yet, that is what happened. Pharoah commanded that the Jews would henceforth have to find their own straw to make bricks, without reducing the number that they usually made (Shmos 5:7-8). This added burden disturbed Moshe who asked Hashem, “Why have You done evil to this People, why have you sent me?” (Shmos 5:22). Hashem responded (Shmos 6:2-3) that He had appeared to Avraham, Yitzchak, and Yaakov, and they never criticized Him the way Moshe had.

The Talmud (Sanhedrin 111A) explains the circumstances that could have caused the Avos to criticize Hashem. Hashem had promised Eretz Yisroel to Avraham (Bereishis 13:17). However, Avraham was unable find a place to bury Sarah until he purchased it for four hundred silver shekels. Hashem had told Yitzchak that Hashem would be with him and bless him (Bereishis 26:3). Yet, whenever Yitzchak’s servants dug a well, the herdsmen of Gerar quarreled with them and said that the water belonged to them (Bereishis 26:20). Hashem had promised the land to Yaakov (Bereishis 28:13). Yet, Yaakov could not find a place to pitch his tents until he purchased land for one hundred coins. In all those circumstances, each of the Avos did not question Hashem.

The Midrash Yalkut Shimoni (Chapter 176) and the Midrash Rabba (Shmos 6) indicate that Hashem was unhappy with Moshe’s criticism.  The Attribute of Strict Justice wanted to punish Moshe for it. This is alluded to by the first two words in the pasuk, “Vayedaber Elokim” (Bereishis 6:2). Elokim refers to Hashem’s attribute of strict justice. Hashem understood that Moshe’s motivation was the pain he felt for the Jewish People at seeing this harsh turn of events. Therefore, The Attribute of Mercy was invoked, and Moshe was spared. This is alluded to by the later words of that pasuk, “Vayomer Ani Hashem”, indicating kindness and mercy.

Rashi says that Moshe was punished by losing the opportunity to bring the Jews into Eretz Yisroel.

I was bothered by two questions. Firstly, what was the meaning of Hashem’s complaint that the Avos never criticized Hashem whereas Moshe did? What was the comparison? The complaints that the Avos could have potentially had, were monetary. The Avos had to pay excessive money for something that had been promised to them. Thus, they could have felt that they should have received it for free. Moshe was complaining about the added torture and pain to Klal Yisroel. Isn’t a concern about another’s pain a stronger complaint than one about money?

Furthermore, according to some commentaries, Moshe had a basis for his complaint! According to the Talmud (Sanhedrin 111A. See Rashi and Chidushei Aggadot), Pharoah’s decree was not only that the Jews would have to find their own straw. They would have to produce the same number of bricks as before, and if they couldn’t, then Jewish babies would be taken and crushed into the bricks! In addition, other Jews were killed by the sword. These events only occurred after Moshe had come to tell Pharoah to free the Jews. Therefore, Moshe criticized Hashem saying, “Why have you done bad with this People…”?! (Bereishis 5:22)

The Midrash Rabba (Shmos 6:1) explains Moshe’s error. In doing so, my questions are also answered. How can any human being ever question the wisdom of Hashem’s actions which were already done? Every action of Hashem is precise. In fact, Hashem explains all His actions to the Heavenly Court, and they testify to its righteousness. How could Moshe think that he knew better than Hashem? The Midrash considers Moshe’s thoughts as foolishness. In fact, the Ben Yehoyada says that the added intensity of the servitude that occurred after Moshe’s coming to Pharaoh was beneficial! The added pain allowed the Jews to be redeemed sooner than they would otherwise have been.

Hashem runs the world in a precise and well-thought-out way, that is beyond human understanding.

Many things occur that we do not understand. We want to cry out to Hashem, “Why are you treating me badly?!” We must stay steadfast in our faith and must always remember that Hashem has a plan, for our ultimate benefit. What we perceive as bad, can, in fact, become our salvation.

These thoughts can help us weather life’s challenges.

Parshas Vayakhel/Pekudei

How To Succeed!

“Take from yourselves a portion for Hashem, everyone whose heart motivates him shall bring it …” (Shmos 35:5)

The Rabbi of the synagogue had just finished speaking. The president stood up and started announcing the pledges for the building fund, for the new synagogue building. Shmuel was very wealthy, yet he was not planning on giving a large donation. The president announced, “Yaakov Cohen pledges $10,000, Reuvein Weiss pledges $10,000, Bernie Gol pledges $10,000, ….” Shmuel heard the names of his wealthy friends pledging large donations. He thought to himself, “How would it look if I am the only one of my friends that does not contribute generously?” Begrudgingly, he raised his hand, also pledging $10,000.

Moshe assembled all the Jewish People telling them that Hashem was giving them the privilege of constructing the Mishkan, the Tabernacle that would contain G-D’s Holy presence. Moshe told them all the materials that were needed and added that “everyone whose heart motivates him shall bring it”. The Kli Yakar explains that apparently, this was a prerequisite. If you did not donate graciously and whole-heartedly, it was not accepted. A donation such as Shmuel’s would not have been accepted.  Rabbi Naftali Tzvi Yehudah Berlin zt”l in his commentary on the Torah, Ha’emek Davar says that the words “he shall bring it” teach us that the donor must bring his donation personally. He may not send it with someone else. The reason is that those who are collecting the donations must ascertain that this donation is being given graciously and wholeheartedly and not due to peer pressure.

Why was it necessary for the donation to be given wholeheartedly? The Chasam Sofer says, everything that we have is from Hashem. When the Jews donated their wealth, it was only as if they were returning what Hashem had given them. The only thing that the Jews could give Hashem was their “hearts”, by donating lovingly and wholeheartedly.

The Ohr HaChaim gives a different explanation. He says that Hashem also donated something to the construction. Hashem gave something intangible, something holy, which brought together all the contributions, sustaining the Mishkan and enabling it to stand. The donor had to elevate his gift to a high, spiritual level so that it could merge with Hashem’s donation.  If the human donor did not possess the graciousness that the Torah describes, then the gift of such a person had no chance of merging with Hashem’s gift.

I had another thought that perhaps may explain why it was necessary for the donation to be given wholeheartedly. The Talmud (Bava Metzia 85B) quotes a story about Rabbi Chiya. Rabbi Chiya told Rabbi Chanina that he was working to ensure that Torah not be forgotten. What did he do? He planted flax. When the flax grew, he would harvest it and would weave it into nets to trap deer. When he caught the deer, he would feed its meat to orphans and would turn the deer skins into parchment. He would write each of the Five Books of the Torah on separate parchments and each of the Six Orders of the Mishna on separate parchments. He would go to a town where there was no one to teach Torah. There, he would teach five children.  He would teach each child one of the Five Books of the Torah. Then he would teach the Six Orders of the Mishnah to six other children. When he completed teaching them, he told them to teach each other, until he returned. Each child eventually learned all the five Books of the Torah as well as the Six Orders of the Mishna. This way, he ensured that the Torah would not be forgotten by the Jewish people.

Why was it necessary for Rabbi Chiya to go to all this trouble to plant, harvest, make nets, catch deer, etc…? Why didn’t he just buy parchment and write the Torah on it? The Maharsha answers that Rav Chiya was starting a new project for the sake of the Torah. He wanted to do every single action for the sake of Hashem and to imbue each action with greater holiness, ensuring a greater chance for success. 

Perhaps, each person donating graciously, added to the holiness of Mishkan as it was being built for the first time.

When we embark on a new project, our thoughts and intentions impact the success of the project.
If all of the required actions are done totally for the sake of Hashem, we have a better chance at success.

Parshas Ki Sisa

Get Paid “Millions” Just for Trying!

“And Hashem gave Moshe [the luchos] when He finished speaking to him on Mount Sinai”. (Shmos 31:18)

My shoes were in bad shape, so I brought them to the shoemaker. I returned a few days later. The shoemaker said that the bill was $40. However, I noticed that the shoes were in the same bad shape. The shoemaker had not fixed them. I asked him why he charged me $40 when he obviously did not fix the shoes. He told me that he tried hard to fix them and that the $40 was for his time and effort.

I can not imagine anyone being willing to pay the shoemaker for his effort. The way of the world is to pay for results, not solely for effort. However, there is a situation where a worker DOES get paid for his effort. ….

The Midrash (Shir Hashirim 5:11) quotes a story about two workers, a foolish one and a wise one. A man approached them with an unusual request. He offered to pay them to pour water into a basket with a hole in it. The foolish worker refused the job. He felt that the job was purposeless. All the water would flow out of the hole in the basket. The wise worker accepted the job. Obviously, the owner knew that the water would spill out. He was willing to pay the worker for his efforts.

The Midrash compares this story to learning Torah. A foolish person refuses to learn. He feels that he is not too smart and will quickly forget his learning. If so, for what purpose should he learn? The wise person is different. He also understands that eventually he will forget what he learns. However, he realizes that Hashem will reward him richly for his efforts!

Many of us learn Torah. We remember some of it and forget some of it. At times, we find that even attempting to learn is very difficult. As much as we try, we still do not understand what we are learning.

Sometimes Hashem grants us Heavenly assistance which helps us understand something that we previously could not understand. However, even if we still do not understand it after much effort, we should always remember that Hashem rewards us for our efforts!

The Sefer Chasidim says something truly amazing which should comfort and encourage anyone who is frustrated by his inability to learn Torah. He says that one who struggles to learn Torah but is incapable of understanding, will be richly rewarded. When he arrives in the World to Come and sits in the Heavenly yeshiva, he will be able to understand the Torah which he struggled to understand in this world.

After the Jewish People received the Torah, Moshe went up to Heaven.  He remained there for 40 days and 40 nights, while Hashem taught him the entire Torah (the Written and Oral Torah). The Talmud (Nedarim 38A) quotes Rabbi Yochanan who says that Moshe kept forgetting the Torah that he had learned. Moshe felt frustrated. Hashem finally gave Moshe the Torah as a gift, enabling him to remember all that he had learned.

The Alshich asks, If Hashem knew that Moshe would be unable to remember all the Torah that he was taught, why didn’t Hashem give it to him as a gift right away? Why did Moshe have to struggle and become frustrated with a task that was doomed for failure?

The Alshich answers that Moshe was destined to transmit the Torah to The Jewish People. That transmission would continue throughout all future generations. To be worthy of this privilege, Moshe had to endure the emotional pain and frustration of learning and forgetting. Despite the setbacks, Moshe persevered and did not give up. Since he did not give up, Hashem granted him the Torah as a gift

At times, the effort to learn or understand Torah or to remember what we had learned can be difficult and frustrating. A person may want to “throw his hands up” and give up, feeling that it is not worth it. As hard as it is, we should NEVER give up.  Sometimes, Hashem will reward our struggles and grant us the Divine assistance to understand or to remember.

Even if we still do not understand or remember, we receive unimaginable reward, just for trying!!

Our struggles will also bear fruit after 120 years, when we go to the Heavenly yeshiva.

Then, we will be able to understand and remember the Torah that we toiled over.

(This dvar Torah is based on Rav Pam on Chumash by Rabbi Sholom Smith)

Parshas Tetzaveh

Light that Lamp Again and Again!

“And you shall command the Jewish People that they shall take for you pure, pressed, olive oil for light, to continually light the lamp.” (27:2)

Imagine if you had an offer for the opportunity of a lifetime. Hashem sent someone to ask you, “Would you like to donate some money for the Third Bais HaMikdash? It is 100% guaranteed to be built very soon.”

Which Jew would not grab this “golden” opportunity and donate as much as he could?

If Hashem’s representative made the same request the following day, I am sure that you would donate again. Perhaps even if you receive the same request a third or fourth time, you probably would still donate. What if the representative comes to you again and again? Would you still donate towards this holy endeavor on a daily or weekly basis? You probably would not be interested in continuously donating, even if you have the money to do so, since the request is so repetitive and costly. However, if you would stop to think for a moment, why wouldn’t you donate? It is for a holy cause beyond description!

Hashem had told Moshe to “Speak to the Jewish People” (Shmos 25:2), asking them for donations to build the Mishkan (Tabernacle). Yet, when Hashem asked Moshe to ask the Jewish People to provide pure oil to light the Menorah, Hashem told Moshe to “Command the Jewish People”. Hashem also used the words, “to command” regarding the Korban Tamid (a sacrifice) which was brought twice daily. Why was it necessary to command the Jewish People to participate in these two mitzvos? Wouldn’t it have been enough to simply speak to them? The Ba’al Haturim explains that these two mitzvos are unique. Both mitzvos were done every day and both mitzvos required an outlay of money from the Jewish People.

This teaches us an understanding of human nature. If there is a mitzvah that is repetitive or costly, it is hard to fulfill it repeatedly. We may lose our enthusiasm for certain mitzvos. We should constantly review the value of each mitzvah and the opportunity that it provides us to be close to Hashem for eternity (which is a very long time). That might inspire us to feel that each time we are doing the mitzvah, it is as if it is the first time that we did it.

Furthermore, we see that the purpose of Hashem’s command to do these two mitzvos was to solve the afore mentioned problem. Merely the knowledge that Hashem had commanded us to do them, was enough to inspire and motivate us to fulfill them.

We can be inspired to do all the mitzvos repeatedly by realizing that they are the guidelines and obligations

given to us by the Master of All. The mitzvos enable each of us to live the happiest and best possible life.

Parshas Terumah

Heaven Help You!

“And you shall make a Menorah of pure gold, hammered out shall the Menorah be made….”

A man had heard that the Chozeh of Lublin was a very holy man and could tell what a person was thinking by looking at him. Skeptical, he asked the Chozeh if he knew what he had davened for. The Chozeh told him that had petitioned Hashem to allow him to have more free time to learn Torah. Apparently, he had very little free time to learn Torah. Even the free time that he did have was wrought with the challenge of being very tired from a long day at work. This man had learned Torah for many years. Now he had to support a family and found that his time to learn Torah was very limited. The young man was astounded that the Chozeh knew what he had davened for. He asked the Chozeh what Heaven’s response was, to his prayers. The Chozeh said that the angels laughed. Hashem could easily send money to this young man enabling him to spend more time learning. However, that was not what Hashem wanted. What Hashem wanted was to see this man’s determination to learn despite the less than optimum conditions. What was precious in Hashem’s eyes was that this man learned as much as he was able to despite his challenges. (based on a story told by Rabbi Dovid Ashear)

The Parsha discusses the utensils in the Mishkan (Tabernacle). The Aron (Ark), the Menorah (Table), and the Mizbayach Haketores (Incense Altar) represented the three crowns that were given to the Jewish People. As such, each was constructed with a golden crown around it. The crowns were the Crown of Torah, the Crown of Kingship, and the Crown of Priesthood. The Crown of Priesthood was exclusively for the kohanim and the Crown of Kingship was for the tribe of Yehudah, for King David and his offspring. The Crown of Torah is available for every single Jew. Whoever wants to, can acquire the Crown of Torah.

A person who learns Torah can feel a sense of spirituality and holiness, a connection to Hashem. However, learning Torah may not come easily to some people. (Although nowadays it is so much easier since we have with so many sefarim written in English and so many online Torah classes in English). The Sfas Emes (quoted by Rabbi Yissachar Dov Rubin in Talelei Oros) gives an answer for those people. One of the vessels in the Mishkan was the Menorah. The Menorah had a very intricate design. Hashem showed Moshe how to make it. Moshe had such difficulty understanding what to do that Hashem told him to throw a large gold ingot into the fire and the Menorah would be made by itself, miraculously. The Sfas Emes questions, If the Menorah was going to be made miraculously, why was it necessary for Hashem to first show Moshe how to make it? The Sfas Emes says that this teaches us a very important lesson. When a person tries as hard as he can to do a mitzvah but cannot do any more, then he will get siyata dishmaya and Hashem will help him complete it. The Talmud (Shabbos 104A) states that if a person tries to purify himself, Hashem will assist him to succeed. Not every person is able to perform every mitzvah to perfection. However, if he tries his utmost, Hashem will assist him.

The Parsha also lists all the items that Moshe collected from the Jewish People for the construction of the Mishkan. The last items that were mentioned were the precious stones that were placed in the Choshen (the breastplate of the Kohain Gadol). The Ohr HaChaim said that these precious stones were the most valuable of all the materials that were collected. If so, why were they mentioned last? The Ohr HaChaim gives three answers. The last answer is based on the Talmud (Yuma 75A) that says that these precious stones fell from the sky, together with the Manna. Targum Yonassan ben Uziel (Shmos 35:28) says that the Pillar of Cloud (that guided the Jews during the daytime) brought these stones from the Pishon River, one of the rivers that flowed from Gan Eden. The Ohr HaChaim says, all the other items that were donated to the Mishkan were acquired with effort and donated at a cost to the owner. However, these precious stones were acquired with no effort and at no cost. Therefore, they were not as precious to Hashem as the other gifts. Therefore, they were written last.

We see from this, that what Hashem truly values is our effort.

If we try our utmost in the performance of a mitzvah, Hashem will help us succeed!

Parshas Mishpatim

Do You Truly Want to be Happy? The Secret is…

“If you see your enemy’s donkey struggling under its load … You shall repeatedly help him”. (Shmos 23:5)

Rabbi Yisroel Salanter zt”l once shared a compartment on the train with another Jew. The other fellow did not realize that he was in the presence of a great Torah leader. He acted continuously rude and obnoxious during the ride. Later, when the man found out the identity of his compartment mate, he went to Rabbi Yisroel and begged for forgiveness. Rabbi Yisroel quickly forgave him. In addition, Rabbi Yisroel went out of his way to help this man. When questioned why, Rabbi Yisroel explained, when a person feels offended or embarrassed, deciding to forgive the person will not suffice to wipe away the ill feelings. The only way to remove resentment from the heart is to do a concrete action of helping the person who had offended you (Talelei Oros by Rabbi Yissachar Dov Rubin).

If you see your enemy’s animal struggling under a load that is too heavy for it, it is a mitzvah to help him unload the heavy burden. The Talmud (Pesachim 113B) asks, why we consider this your enemy’s animal? Doesn’t the Torah say that you are forbidden to hate another Jew (Vayikra 19:17) in your heart? The Talmud answers that we are speaking about a person to whom it is a mitzvah for you to hate! You were the solitary witness who saw this person do an immoral and abominable act, making him a rasha in your eyes (If two people witnessed this act then the sinner could be brought to court and it would be a mitzvah for everyone to hate him. Since only you saw the act, you are not permitted to testify in court. However, you are still obligated to hate him). Even though you hate this person, the Torah obligates you to help him with his animal. The reason is to prevent the hatred from increasing and snowballing to a level that is not warranted. Tosefos explains that the animal owner sees the hatred reflected on your face and therefore also hates you. If you do not help him, he will hate you even more. That feeling will show in his face. When you see that, you will hate him even more. …..

HaRav Alter Henach Leibowitz z”tl says that when you help him with his animal, you are supposed to fulfill the mitzvah in its entirety and with joy, as you do any mitzvah. We see that you can have two powerful, yet contradictory, feelings in your heart at the same time. On the one hand, you feel hatred for this person. On the other hand, you are doing the mitzvah out of love for him.

HaRav Alter Henach Leibowitz z”tl says that the Targum Onkelos goes even one step further. He says that while you are in the act of performing the mitzvah, you should remove, from your heart, all your feelings of hatred towards him. Apparently, you should act with the same feelings of love that you would have for any Jew. When you finish helping him, you should restore your previous feeling of hatred towards him. Amazingly, the Targum Onkelos feels that a person is capable of completely removing the feelings of hatred that he feels in his heart, albeit temporarily.

No person is perfect. We all err, and, at times, we wrong our friend who then gets angry at us. Our friend also errs and causes us to be angry at him. The anger can lead to a degree of feelings of hatred, even though that is forbidden from the Torah. However, as the Targum Onkelos says, we can remove those feelings of hatred from our heart. How do we do so? Rav Avraham Pam zt”l (in Rav Pam on Chumash by Rabbi Sholom Smith) quotes the Talmud (Derech Eretz Zuta -2) which says, “If one wishes to increase his love for another person, he should exert himself to do kindnesses to the other person.” This will erase any ill feelings one person has towards the other.

This is a very valuable tip to help us have happy relationships with others. If we are upset at someone, we should act with kindness towards them, and sometimes do multiple acts of kindness. That will help us remove our negative feelings towards them and ultimately will make us happier. Isn’t that what we really want? To be happy?

Parshas Yisro

Is This the Ultimate?

“And Moshe went down to the people and spoke to them. Hashem spoke all these words, saying”. (Shmos 19:25; 20:1)

There was a very important meeting in the European town to discuss a problem with kashrus. Apparently, there was a real concern about the kosher standards of a particular butcher. As the community meeting was about to start, the butcher walked in and sat down. The Rav noticed him and started talking about something else. After a while, some of the other attendees were getting anxious and wanted to start discussing the issue at hand. They wanted to tell the butcher to leave so that they could begin the meeting. The Rav refused. Only after the butcher left, did the Rav start discussing the pressing issue. This was a very important meeting to discuss a very important topic. Yet, the Rav showed derech eretz, sensitivity to another, to the butcher, and did not ask him to leave or discuss the topic in front of him. The Rav’s actions were even more special when you consider that it was this very butcher’s misdeeds that had prompted them to call this meeting.

After the Jewish People left Egypt and reached the foot of Har (Mount) Sinai. Hashem sent Moshe with a message to the Jews, asking if they would be willing to accept the Torah. The Jews responded with a resounding, “All that Hashem has spoken, we will do!” (Shmos 19:8)

Moshe returned to tell Hashem what the Jews responded. Rashi wonders why Moshe had to tell that to Hashem. Obviously, Hashem who is All-Knowing, knew what the Jews had said. Rashi explains that Moshe acted with derech eretz. He was sent to ask a question and felt that it was appropriate that he return with the answer.

Rabbi Dovid Leibowitz zt”l  highlights from this Rashi how important derech eretz is. This was the greatest moment in the history of the Jewish People. Hashem was about to reveal His Holiness to them and give them the Torah. Yet, Moshe felt that this small act of derech eretz should be done. Even at momentous moments, one must still think of the “minute” matters and act with derech eretz.

We learn a similar lesson later in the Parsha. The Midrash (Shmos 28:3) says that Hashem was about to open the heavens and show His glory to the Jewish People. Hashem was going to speak directly to them and present them with the 10 Commandments. Moshe was still standing in Hashem’s presence. At this point, Hashem did not want Moshe there. The Maharzu explains that Hashem was concerned lest the Jews would wonder who had said, “I am the L-rd your G-d”. Was it Hashem who had said it or was it Moshe who had said it while he was hidden in the dark cloud on Har Sinai?  Hashem wanted Moshe to leave. Hashem asked Moshe to descend the mountain and instruct the Jews to prepare themselves for this moment. Moshe replied that he had already done so. Moshe did not understand that Hashem wanted him to leave. Therefore, Hashem gave Moshe another instruction asking him to descend and come back up with his brother, Aharon, with each of them ascending to a different point on the mountain. As soon as Moshe descended, Hashem revealed Himself the Jewish People and started saying the 10 Commandments (Shmos 20:25, 21:1).

If Hashem did not want Moshe in the heavens when He revealed Himself, why didn’t Hashem simply tell Moshe to leave? The Maharzu explains that Hashem did not want Moshe to feel bad. Rabbi Alter Henach Leibowitz zt”l highlights the great lesson we learn from Hashem’s actions. Hashem wanted to open the heavens to speak directly to the Jewish People. This would have a tremendous impact on the Jewish People, an impact that would last forever. This was the most important moment in the history of the Jews. This was the crowning achievement. This was the purpose of both the Creation of the world and the Exodus from Egypt. Moshe would have certainly understood if Hashem Himself would have requested that he not be there. Yet, Hashem was concerned that, perhaps on some minimalistic level, Moshe might have felt bad.

Hashem is teaching us the ultimate derech eretz that we must have for others. Under all circumstances, even when involved in something of extreme importance, it is mandatory to be sensitive to another person’s feelings.